N2

Woke up the same way
Never feels like a new day
Always stuck in a bad dream
Why can't I wake up

But how can I face this
When I'm self medicated
I'm just filled up with hatred
Rotting to the bone

I was on my own
Just staring at the phone
Left here thinking bout the people
And the places I call home
I'm so confused
I know I'll sort it out
And find some common ground
I just need to find the pieces
That I know will fill this hole

So stay way
I'm not what you think
I didn't wanna be this
Broken I can feel it

Down to my bones
But I should've known
This isn't how I heal this
Selfish in my dealings

I don't know how to fix myself for you
Well do you
Cuz I just play it off well
Playing dumb still
Waiting for you
While I'm just pulling myself in two

I've been running in circles
Looking for what's essential
Only finding residual
It's just not enough

Things got so complicated
Can you feel my frustration
It's the only foundation
I keep putting up

I play pretend
With what I'm feeling within
I'm pushing everyone away
That gives a fuck about me

So I'll just end up alone
It ends up feeling like home
But that's okay cuz I've been dealing with these thoughts on my own

I'll just pull myself in two
Can't you feel the weight Get heavier with time