The Story of Something

[Verse 1: Mr. Feet]
Wake up at 4:00 PM, it's time to shit again
I go into the bathroom and I pull down my pants
By pants I mean underwear, I just needed a rhyme
Sit down on the toilet seat, time to shit my insides
I'm trying to shit so no one bother me
And if you need to pee you'll have to use a fucking tree
Don't be a bitch, I need to shit and piss
I need to my wipe my ass so I'll take my fucking time

[Verse 2: Mr. Feet & Wife]
My wife she wakes up at a quarter til' 5:00
She needs to use the potty, holy fuck, I need to wipe
Please hurry up baby
I'm trying to hurry
Don't get an attitude
I'm just trying to take a poo
I need to pee
Baby please don't get angry
Just clench your ass and leave
It doesn't work that way I got Chinеse!
Just let me go
You'll havе to fucking wait
But baby hurry please
Talking won't quicken the pace
She opened the bathroom door
She huffed and looked angry
I will fucking stab your fucking balls
If you don't let me fucking pee
She pushed me out the seat and sat her pussy right on down
This marriage is over, I don't even love you now

[Verse 3: Mr. Feet & Doctor]
It's been 2 fucking years, my wife divorced me
She got a new house and she got remarried
I went to the doctor about my rectum
He said I take a while, because I'm unhealthy
Wait, your test results are in, you're clinically depressed
Sorry it took so long, my girl and I just had sex
Oh wait she's calling me, you got a pregnancy test?
Holy fuck, it's positive? I can't wait, I'm gonna have a kid
I just learned the doctor married my wife
I might give up on this shitty life
They're gonna have a fucking kid
And she never visits Amy and Tim
You don't need the child support
Stop taking my money you fucking whore
Just be there for the kids, I'm sorry for needing to shit
Why god? Why? Why have you abandoned me?
Why did you not give me two-ply?
I could of saved my life, I could of kept my wife
So why god why god?
Goddamnit I shit myself