Eminem (feat. Canserbero) - The Real Slim Shady (remix)

May I have your attention, please?
May I have your attention, please?
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here

Y'all act like you never seen a white person before
Jaws all on the floor, like Pam like Tommy just burst in the door
And started whoopin' her ass worse than before
They first were divorced, throwin' her over furniture (agh!)
It's the return of the: Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding
He didn't just say what I think he did, did he?
And Dr. Dre said: Nothing, you idiots!

Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement (ha ha!)
Feminist women love Eminem
Chicka, chicka, chicka, Slim Shady, I'm sick of him
Look at him, walkin' around, grabbin' his you-know-what
Flippin' the you-know-who, yeah, but he's so cute though
Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
But no worse than what's goin' on in your parents' bedrooms
Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just let loose
But can't, but it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips
And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
Of course they're gonna know what intercourse is
By the time they hit fourth grade
They've got the Discovery Channel, don't they?

We ain't nothin' but mammals
Well, some of us, cannibals
Who cut other people open like cantaloupes
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
Women, wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus, and it goes

I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

Voy
Dice

Apenas con uso de razón en las esquinas de la Pica
Mi lindo barrio dónde la sangre salpica agobiado
Por problemas que los adultos mortifican
Y yo con 11 años viendo cómo los sueños se achican, inmaduro
Hasta reggaeton pensé cantar
Esperando el dinero que supuestamente iba a llegar

Con el que movería
Con el que ayudaría
Al don que en una bicicleta vendiendo helados me mantenía

Hoy en día hablan mal de mí a la ligera
Como si me interesará
Como que si me conocieran
Como si supieran mi nombre real, no Canserbero
Yo no soy rapero, sino que sé rimar y soy sincero, pero

Al parecer eso no importa en estos tiempos en que pa sonar
En radio hay que cantar con otro acento
Decir que eres violento
Como por ejemplo, esos populares raperos
Que están presos o muertos, señores

Déjeme decirle que les han mentido
Que lo que hasta ahora han escuchado es mierda poco cuerda y sin sentido
Por eso siento que he sido elegido para quitar la máscara
De esos que en vez de música hacen ruido

Porque he aprendido del fracaso
Yo no soy perfecto men, yo soy lo que soy a punta'e coñazos
Para qué venga un falso
A discutir de mi humildad
De mi sinceridad cuándo mi lema es ni menos ni más más

Más cabe en un pacto
En el que me propuse que
Crearía letras al mundo en base a lo poco que sé y así fue
Cómo descubrí que más vale un puño arriba que un puño'e papeles
Con la cara'e Simón Bolívar, mi fortuna es mi vida
Y hoy pocos dudan lo que diga el índigo mejor conocido como el mata mentiras

Wannabes no captan que somos los prodigys
Entrenen mis, que quieren competir real hiphoperis

Hablando a la clara no somos del montón
Dedicado también a los oyentes, traje el telón
Que en cada canción sube la mano a la ligera
Quizás por eso no hizo música bailable Alí Primera, es que

Me da arrechera que se crean número uno
Títeres que no mueven las neuronas, pero sí el culo
Algunos de ellos
Doblan temas en tarima, montan bailarinas
Mientras te dicen que asesinan

Si oyes bien sus beats
Son casi, casi reggaeton
Y si oyes bien sus flows son peores que Snoop o Lil Jon

Nah, come on son!
Ustedes son una falta de respeto a la
Gente de verdad y a la
Forma de vivir en el ghetto
De paso ofenden a los que si sacan cara por estos

Si temen al perro
No me vean, déjenlo quieto
Chaquetas, lentejuelas, cadenas, lentes, anillos
Poses en las portadas, cejas sacadas, zarcillos

Esa mierda no es hip hop, entiendan
De una vez por todas que hay gente real, no toda
Son títeres de la moda, yo'

Micrófonos, puños arribas

I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records
Well, I do, so fuck him and fuck you too!
You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me
But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?
Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here?
So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears?
Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first
Little bitch put me on blast on MTV

Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee
I should download her audio on MP3
And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD (agh!)
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups
All you do is annoy me, so I have been sent here to destroy you
And there's a million of us just like me
Who cuss like me, who just don't give a fuck like me
Who dress like me, walk, talk and act like me
And just might be the next best thing, but not quite me

'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

I'm like a head trip to listen to
‘Cause I'm only givin' you things you joke about
With your friends inside your livin' room
The only difference is I got the balls to say it in front of y'all
And I don't gotta be false or sugarcoat it at all
I just get on the mic and spit it
And whether you like to admit it, I just shit it
Better than 90% of you rappers out can

Then you wonder: How can kids eat up these albums like Valiums?
It's funny, ‘cause at the rate I'm going, when I'm 30
I'll be the only person in the nursing home flirting
Pinching nurse's asses when I'm jacking off with Jergens
And I'm jerking, but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working
And every single person is a Slim Shady lurking

He could be working at Burger King, spittin' on your onion rings
Or in the parking lot, circling, screaming: I don't give a fuck!
With his windows down and his system up
So will the real Shady please stand up
And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?

I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

Ha ha
I guess there’s a Slim Shady in all of us
Fuck it, let’s all stand up