Checkin In

I'm just living check to check
I'm just living checking opportunities
Like hey what's next
Friends hit my phone
To make some moves wit me
I read that text
Family approves of what I choose
And what I choose
To be so frugally
So yeah I'm blessed
Ain't no room for second thoughts
Ain't no time for feeling less
I been clearing space up in my mind
There ain't no place for stress
I feel there's a glare up in my eyes
I need to get lasek
Damn you know I meant lasik
In my bed I lay I'm sick
I'm so focused on this shit
I stay in my lane no drift
Ones who close to me
Arms length away
And those opposed stay sit
Man you know I mean stay put
Often puttin down my foot
Steady laying down the law
Open heart might be my flaw
Really think I care too much
Wish I focused on myself
Days I waste away
At times I pray one day for better health
Fraid the sky stay gray
Never sun rays
To shine through what I felt
Blame I stray away from everyday
I leave that on the shelf

And I hope I find my place
Where everyone around me
Spreading love
Family straight
Ain't been time to come together
Know my mind in cloudy weather
I'm gon shine through mine however
Where I'll be there ain't to tellin
Dig graves for my mistakes
Theres higher stakes where I be dwellin
Ain't nowhere safe to settle in
I really hate the state I'm in
But I'll be straight just checking in

This that feeling I won't regret
And to my parents
I'm hoping I won't upset
I feel the pressure
It's pushing down on my chest
If i told you I wasn't worried
I swear it wasn't a flex
I'm just confident in my work
I know the distance I've traveled
I know the cost of my worth
I see the people around me
I know they got it way worse
It's hard to even explain it
Just know I'm lucky
That's first
This that orange slices at halftime
Getting ice cream
Celebrate with yo dad time
Cruising wit homies
Golden hour
My pastime
Tell me there's a wait to go
I ain't waiting in that line
Days Im second guessin myself
How you call them your friends
When you couldn't trust in yourself
Dreams high on the shelf
One day I'll bloom I suppose it
But how you expect to grow
If the seeds you planted ain't showing
I'm hoping
Yeah I'm hoping
Yeah I'm hoping
Wishing
Praying good luck you know I ain't choking
I go through the motions
I go through the motions
Ain't no second guessing it
You know that I'm chosen