THE JUDAS CONTRACT. (DEMO)

[Intro]
Hope you find what you're looking for
Hope it’s worth it
Marina used to say it's me or her, but that was rooted deep beneath the surface
Now I'm serving life and suicide is flirting
Made so many promises
Many, many promises
I’m in a different war, fighting trauma
Mentally, I'm all out
Going all out, hey

Hope you find what you're looking for
Hope it's worth it
Marina used to say it's me or her, but that was rooted deep beneath the surface
Now I'm serving life and suicide is flirting
Made so many promises
Many, many promises
I'm in a war and it's all over consciousness
Psychically, all out
Going all out, whoa

[Verse 1]
God taketh away and God giveth
I dеfy the odds by digging graves for the odds living
Thеy minimize lives if they weren’t made in their God’s image
I won't apologize, even if it’s their pride I offended
Set back
Murdered, I heard lies of demons that crept back
Submerged in darkness
Never had a choice in making my own bed fore you turned it to a coffin
Glimmers of light, nah, I don't see them often
Still I'm reminiscing on every minute I'm missing out on you
Don’t want you to feel resentment or neglect towards me, please
Rest assure, I'm well aware of what the cost will be
Murder victims doing somersaults
For the green, clean over counters, best believe some will vault
Pedophilic rings linked to some occult
If I'm home to you and you're home to me
Then I'm home to two

[Bridge]
Where all my demons at
I hear them screaming, and sometimes I get to screaming back
Only have two friends that I've been needing bad
I know you may not understand, but I'm at peace with that
Y'all content just watching all these kids die
Y'all content if it means in the end, I bleed
Won't pretend I care if you apologize
If you ain't them, you can't tell me anything
Lost souls all around got you polarized
Had enough of giving y'all my energy
Been trapped so long, couldn't tell a lie apart from the truth
Or a friend from an enemy
I know y'all can't wait just to see me die
But the joke ain't on you, you're the joke
Even if I lose it all, in death, I get to breathe

[Verse 2]
F these drugs, the money, and clubs they fiend for (whoa)
F my life and all those slugs they scream for (whoa)
All your wars, your flag, your anthem all that (whoa)
God missed all my calls, chose not to call back (whoa)
I know all my flaws, I know all my wrongs
I don't seek forgiveness, know when to fall back
Won't be lost much longer, told you rent's due
Mindset is death and trauma, all that
I don't have enough time left to resent you

[Refrain]
Thoughts rather vindictive
No walls surround me, death came knocking
I don't know love, and I don't know me
Got to know darkness, got to know sleep
Losing my balance, off of my feet
I don't know Kels and I don't know Lee
But I hear desperation all in y'all screams
Got to know fortune, got to know peace
I don't know fate, I don't know greed
I don't know vengefulness or know hate
Got to know faith, got to know peaks
I don't know pain and I don't know weight
I just know I've been gone for too long
Lost myself more and more through mistakes
Failed escape routes had death come for me
Till I heard two voices tell me, "Breathe"

[Verse 3]
Been the light in the darkest of places
All I'm left with are blood soaked hands
All this just to keep theirs clean
That's ironic, monkey wrenches thrown in all y'all plans
Kelsey told me if I die, we die together
Like F it, let's fight
Marina said screw your ups and downs
When it's all said and done, you just better make sure that you left right
So I've been making sure they know I love them, even if it's for the last time
Depth of my conviction kept me here although it's past time
Trauma got me blacking
Coming back, ain't know what happened
They said I put forth an action that was colder than my last rhyme, uh
Jumping over borders, ain't no police to report it
I've been dead to the world, I'm residing where the morgue is
Hand in hand with death's shadow, dark room full of screams
Kels standing with Aaliyah, both saying don't leave, whoa
Okay, so I complain less
But they'll be traumatized so my death will never be painless
More memories stained with death and misery
Shame that I've got to go to change and memorize what my aim is
That fall is dangerous
I hear y'all calling, but for now you're nameless
If I was flawless, then we wouldn't be friends
I feel y'all clawing just to keep me here
But still I'm falling
So in these last moments, fingers crossed no love is lost
Less about me, more about my love for y'all
Going off the deep end, they say
Nothing worth more to me though, AK
So Kels, tell Aaliyah bout the real me
Remember only you can, tell her how they killed me
America is heartless
But strength, from y'all I draw it
And formerly submerged, I emerge from the darkness
Though I never found hope, y'all never lost it

[Outro]
Though there's strength in my every step, the wounds they dealt to my spirit will never heal if I stay here. Though there's courage in my every breath, I fight with no hope. I fight for you, you, and you. Don't let me go