Peaking Is a Myth

A lot of people mix up depression with self-awareness
"Dude this album is depressing"
I never said I was depressed
I'm lonely
But I'm having the most fun of my goddamn life

Ooh, Imma call u till my phone dies
Either way I can't look into those eyes
So forbidden don't know you messing with yuh
Never good enough peaking is a myth
Ooh, Imma call u till my phone dies
Either way I can't look into those eyes
So forbidden don't know you messing with yuh
Never good enough peaking is a myth

I'm so needy
I need to feel better like right now
To me all I see are ways
That life's got me tied down
I deserve it though
Fake to all my friends though
I never text any of them back
But I expect benefits
How you gonna put up w that?
Why hasn't anybody I love dropped me for my faults and my cracks?
What did I do to deserve you?
What else is on your plate?
Yeah how much can you take?
Yeah what more could unnerve you?

I fluctuated through a braggadocios tone
And a more sophisticated clone of me, I should've known
That there's one real zero
And one real Zach
One doesn't hate their actions
And the other ones prolly named Zach
Before it's my time to go
Whether or not I'm the reason I just want you to know
I fulfilled the prophecy of ruining my loved ones
Never did nothing for me self pity is a drug son

My family do too much
And I don't do enough
I'm scared I'll lose the bond
I barely keep in touch
It feels like LDR
We live 2 rooms apart
I know it's all my fault
Prolly the hardest part
Parting ways with the nostalgia got me tripping
Branches of my childhood tree sap sipping
Used to be the apple juice, soon it will be rosé
Cold days in Indy telling me it will be OK

Ooh, Imma call u till my phone dies
Either way I can't look into those eyes
So forbidden don't know you messing with yuh
Never good enough peaking is a myth
Ooh, Imma call u till my phone dies
Either way I can't look into those eyes
So forbidden don't know you messing with yuh
Never good enough peaking is a myth

I wake up
Look at my hands
Crack my knuckles
I wonder if today
I will touch your heart with words
Or if i will break it using the same method
For some reason God decided that
This question will forever be a gamble
One day I will be dealt
A hand made of hearts
And another day I will lose so horribly I know I'll never break even again