Guilty Pleasures

Life was a sitcom about America
We were always on our best behavior
Masturbating to lift our immune systems
Eating less carbohydrates than we wanted
I was only seventeen and a half

Now I know that the days are getting hotter
Guilty pleasures are right around the corner
Now I know that the nights are getting colder
Guilty pleasures are holding us together
Rise and shine
It's a wonderful day

God did not exist and yet he wanted to
You were hotter than a cheap old laptop
Just like the ones we looted from Target together
Always and now, darling, forever
I was only seventeen and a half

Now I know that the days are getting hotter
Guilty pleasures are right around the corner
Now I know that the nights are getting colder
Guilty pleasures are holding us together
Rise and shine
It's a wonderful day

Now I know that the days are getting hotter
Guilty pleasures are right around the corner
Now I know that the nights are getting colder
Guilty pleasures are holding us together
Rise and shine
It's a wonderful day