Tinder Only Finds Me Fat Chicks

I downloaded this app called Tinder
In hopes that it's gonna get me laid
I swiped right on every single person
In attempts to save some time for myself

My phone buzzes, I got a bunch of matches
Oh man, I'm so excited to see
What's on the menu for a pervert like me
But man, I'm disappointed

Why does every girl on this app
That's over 300 pounds like me
I don't get the fucking deal

None of the normal girls
Want to swipe right on me
So I guess I'm gonna try this all again

The next day, I did it all again
With the burning ambition of getting some leg
My fuckin' phone has a stroke and a seizure
At the same damn time, it's going insane

I get nervous, I'm scared to even look
At the list of horny people that's staring at me
I take a look, my manhood is shattered
Parades fo fat women are flicking their bean

Why does every girl on this app
That's over 300 pounds like me
I can't believe this real

None of the normal girls
Want to have sex with me
So I guess I have to settle with a man