Ho Chi Minh
[background, continuously under lyrics]
I just could not win against Ho Chi Minh (4x before lyrics)
No...
He stood, and looked upon the earth
His weapon in his hand
His eyesight came to rest
Upon an ancient little man
Tilling the soil and casting nets
His flock and herds to tend
Yet ready at a moment's call
His homeland to defend
He walked into the other's land
An uninvited guest
He said "I'm here to rid you of
A menace and a pest"
He said "I'll build an army base
Right here upon your shores
And I'll protect you from your sons
And from the guy next door"
The old man answered with a snap
"I need no help from you
Why, you're the same one that I fought
At Diem Bien Phu
My sons are out upon the fields
Their country to regain
So why don't you just go back home
And save us both some pain?"
He said "Old man, are you insane?
Do you know who I am?
Why, I'm the policeman of the world
And they call me Uncle Sam"
The old man took his weapon out
And with a real defiant stand
He said "Yes, I know you, and what you'II do
But you see, I just don't give a damn"
He said "Where did this little man
Get the audacity
To take a weapon in his hand
And speak like that to me?
I'll send my helicopters out
To hunt the peasant down
I'll send my jets and my tanks
To burn his villages to the ground"
The old man looked up at this fool
And did not even bat an eye
He said "Before we would submit
You see, we all would rather die
But I feel it fair
That I should warn you, for your sake
This here will be the biggest blunder
That you'll ever make"
The bully, now blushing red
Let out a battle cry
The old man just seemed to fade away
Into the countryside
He smiled and said with confidence
"I've got him on the run"
But poonji sticks and booby traps
Set fire to his buns
The old man fought so hard and well
That so the story goes
He trapped him, a paper tiger
And filled his hide with holes
And as the pain intensified
He cried out loud and clear
"If I could just get untangled, y'all
I'm getting on out of here"
You see
(I just could not win against Ho Chi Minh)
No
(I just could not win against Ho Chi Minh)
I gotta go!
Gimme my hat, and my coat!
My money, I'll leave my guns!
I gotta split!
I gotta leave!
What happened to my boat?
Wheres the plane?
I gotta leave!
You see
(I just could not win against Ho Chi Minh)
No...
(I just could not win against Ho Chi Minh)