The Big Surprise

I am back, this time, I'm the big surprise
And I'm hiding behind your sofa
I'm the culture shock, temporary block
And I?ll love you for the next five minutes

I'm your magazine, ?'cause you read me clean
Without taking any time for pictures
I'm your hand grenade and your lemonade
?'cause I?ll blow up and leave you soured

Find somebody with a working car
And drive them crazy, too
The big surprise is me

I worked extra hard to pick your birthday card
You just threw it out and kept my money
I got up at six to make your favorite dish
So I sank when you said, you weren't hungry

Filed your tax return, let some candles burn
Played Mozart, to make your plants grow
Then I clipped the trees, got down on my knees
Not to work, just to pray, you'd see me

Find somebody who will paint your house
And gloss them over, too