Jedi Bong Hits

[Intro]
There's no weed on Tatooine
Jedi Bong Hits

[TEAMHEADKICK]
Smoke a lot of weed, and well, the truth is
You can guarantee, so does George Lucas
Just take a look around at the Star Wars Universe
You might have done some drugs, but he did 'em all first
We sell to both sides, everyone gets higher
The Rebel Alliance and the Empire
Dagobah Green is the holy god shit
And weed is what we sling with the Jedi Bong Hits
(Jedi Bong Hits)
Woo-hoo! Dagobah Green
(Jedi Bong Hits)

[JT Machinima]
Here, it's all you

[TEAMHEADKICK]
I'm good, bro
Smokin' a bowl with my main man Vader
Can't find the lighter? Then use the Lightsaber
Fat ass Jabba stay outta my business
Inhale the vapor for your carbonite sickness
When you take a hit of this shit into your lungs
Now you're filled up with dank Midi-chlorians
Buckle up, sit back, enjoy the ride
Cause even the Sarlacc is chill tokin' on the Dark Side

[JT Machinima]
I called Han Solo to smugle my dope
When I went to pick it up, he said it all got smoked
I was like: C-3PO, make me lunch, please

[C-3PO]
I'm sorry, sir
Chewbacca has the munchies

[JT Machinima]
Now we doing lightspeed while the Wookie's tripping balls
Smokin' Gungan Skunk Weed cause my ganja's gone

[Jar Jar Binks]
Pass da bong, meesa wants another hit

[JT Machinima]
You can have it, Jar Jar
I'm done with this shit

[TEAMHEADKICK]
Leia's outfit is kind of see-through
I hide my best chronic in R2-D2
Doing hash and wax with my boy Darth Maul
Ten bags of Dagobah, we smoked 'em all
That ain't a moon, it's a battle station
Galactic headshop for legalization
Too high to drive, turn a little tighter
Clip a Star Destroyer, swerve a TIE Fighter

[JT Machinima]
Cuttin' Corusant Kush with my Alderaan Maui
If you ain't 'bout the green, you can get the fuck outtie
Rolling up a blunt, dope straight outta Bespin
Got a DUI when I crashed my fuckin' X-Wing
Ever met a member of the Jedi Council?
Me and Mace Windu each smoked an ounce, ill
He ate the roach and chased it with bong water
Then he told me 'bout Padme and the mind tricks he taught her

[Hook]
There's no weed on Tatooine
Jedi Bong Hits
There's no weed on Tatooine
Jedi Bong Hits

[JT Machinima]
Stormtroopers kick back, fuckin' get down with me
When I'm rippin' Rebel reefer up in fuckin' Cloud City
Hits like a freight train, almost got sick
When Admiral Ackbar hotboxed the starship
He had a fat blunt, then he damn near snapped
He's runnin' up and down the ship screaming "IT'S A TRAP!"
I made a fluke (oops), I smoked a doobie with Luke
I'll never do that again, dude is depressing as fook

[TEAMHEADKICK]
Pack the Dagobah Green into the pipe and spark it
I'm trying to light it (Stay on target)
Stormtroopers are bangin' on drums
Ewoks bogartin' the joints, fuckin' bums
It's puff puff pass, puff puff pass
Obi-Wan Kenobi can blow me cause I'm too fast
Tearin' that bowl up like Bantha Fodder
Doin' shotgun kisses with Amidala

[JT Machinima]
When I'm stoned off my balls, I'm a sick pod racer
Packin' up a bowl with some Tusken raiders
Those motherfuckers go hard
Don't invite Sebulba, that dude's a narc
I made the Kessel run in less then 12 parsecs
Travel 'round the galaxy for interstellar star sex
And I always cut a mean deal for my boys
(I'll trade you an eighth for those two droids)

[TEAMHEADKICK]
Senator Palpatine has a condition
He went to the council for a Dagobah prescription
You can get baked just off the aroma
Yoda smokes Dagobah Green for glaucoma
He's the Willie Nelson of the universe
Smokes so much reefer that he talks in reverse
He's a green machine, he loves to get high

[Yoda]
Do or do not
There is no try

[Darth Vader]
Luke, I am your father

[JT Machinima]
Well, I'm so baked that I can't be bothered
In an airlock chamber filling my lungs
I hear the Sith have sick anti-gravity bongs
When it comes to Ewoks, they get the highest
Sittin' back, puffin' on Endor's finest
Hey, Vader

[Darth Vader]
What?

[JT Machinima]
Take it while it's hot, Dad

[Darth Vader]
That's the best green I've ever had

[TEAMHEADKICK]
Hoth hydroponic and I wish I had a heater
What's taking so long reprogramming those speeders?
Jump on a Tauntaun, goin' for a ride
They smell like butthole on the inside
Boba Fett, my boy, always down to do dabs
Sativa, Indica, every strain that I have
Now everyone gets high 'cause our weed is the bomb
Jedi Bong Master (You're the Padawan)

[Hook]
There's no weed on Tatooine
Jedi Bong Hits
There's no weed on Tatooine
Jedi Bong Hits