Can That Boy Fox Trot!

[CARLOTTA]
I know this grocery clerk
Unprepossessing
Some think the boy's a jerk
They have my blessing
But when he starts to move
He aims to please
Which only goes to prove
That sometimes in a clerk you
Find a Hercules
He hasn't much that's plus
You might describe him thus:

A false alarm
A broken arm
An imitation Hitler and with littler charm
But oh, can that boy foxtrot!

His mouth is mean
He's not too clean
What makes him look reptilian is the brilliantine
But oh, can that boy foxtrot!

Who knows what I saw in him?
I took a chance
Oh, yes, one more flaw in him:
He can't dance

As dumbbells go
He's rather slow
And as for being saintly, even faintly, no
But who needs Albert Schweitzer when the lights are low?
And oh boy, oh boy
Can that boy foxtrot!

(spoken)
Very nice
But no dice
(sung)
You just can't foxtrot
(spoken)
Good lad
Too bad
(sung)
He just can't foxtrot

Right now as I speak of him
I hear those drums!
And oh, the technique of him—
He's all thumbs

His jokes are quaint
And fairly faint
He may be full of hokum but I've no complaint
He often is a bore, but on the floor he ain't—
And oh boy, oh boy
Can that boy foxtrot!