Modern Talk

Modern talk,
Everybody's talkin' modern talk.
Ain't sayin' nothin' with modern talk,
Just zazoo vome voo zazee aza doom va vo
Now picture the scene --
The day is sunny,
A man meets a friend
And he asks for some money,
He says I need five to keep me alive.
Friend gives him this kind of jive -- sayin'
Zaa za voo za za voo I can't make it
Va za va za voo za va see ya later
Vome zoo-za vome a-viddle oo vin
And he's right back out on the street again.

When a girl gets on the phone, she talks to her lover.
She says we got troubles that we can't keep covered.
I just got the news I'm knittin' baby shoes,
So call up the preacher now
And pay your dues.
The guy says:
Zaa za voo za za voo see ya later
Va za va za voo za va I got problems
Vome zoo-za vome a-till then
And she's right back out on the street again.

When a guy gets grabbed by an army recruiter,
He says "We're gonna put you in a khaki suit-a,
So don't you lie and don't you cry
But take this test to qualify."
The guy says:
[Blubbering noises]

When a lady goes down to see her psychiatrist
Lies on a couch to give her head a twist
Is it a psychosis or is it a neurosis?
The doctor gives her this diagnosis:
Zaa za voo za za voo twenty dollars
Va za va za voo za va I got problems
Vome zoo-za vome come back next we'n'sday
And she's right back out on the street again.

On TV there's a man sellin' soap
A man selling hope and a man sellin' dope
While chipmunks sing and politicians swing
And everybody's sayin' the same damn thing.
Zaa za voo za za voo
Va za va za voo za va
Vome zoo-za vome [start to fade out]
Zaa za voo za za voo
Va za va za voo za va
Vome zoo-za vome.