Christopher Columbus

[Verse 1]
The problem with me
Is that I am sick in the heart
Desperate for loving
But too scared to start
But even Willy is free
From this young fantasy
That old Walt Disney promise
That's a-pulling at me

[Verse 2]
In this day and age
There's a profit I know
Well she comes to my doorstep
And opens her coat
She's dealing the prayers that I need the most
But three-hundred dollars is a-cutting it close

[Chorus:]
Gold can buy anything these days
You know that it's true
Everyone tries, but they've all got a price
Yeah, even you
Go roam for the one that will tell you that your money's no good
Pin them down and marry them on the spot
I swear to Jesus I would

[Verse 3]
It seems love is the ship that sailed to search
For that promised new land to be claimed by the church
And glory is the story we hear through the vine
But history omits all them lovers who died
And they cry "save me!
Please save me!
Save my poor sober frame"
We all march religiously in this young lover's parade
Armed to the teeth to attract anyone who'll oblige

[Chorus:]
Gold can buy anything these days
You know that it's true
Everyone tries, but they've all got a price
Yeah, even you
Go roam for the one that will tell you your money's no good
Pin them down and marry them on the spot
I swear to Jesus you should