Butt ugly slut

Eagle, buzzard, sparrow, crow, take me down where the winds don't blow...

I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drinkin' problem and a jealous ol' man in jail
I want one so ugly she'll crack a mirror and so fat she'll knock a needle off a scale
As long as she'll buy me a new Zebeco I don't care if she's built like a blue whale
I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drinkin' problem and a jealous ol' man in jail

Lord she's ignorant
But she's ugly
Yeah, she's lazy
But she's mean
I've been to two tent revivals and a chicken fight and I ain't never seen nothin'
Like when my little wildebeast tears into a dozen jelly-filled Krispy Kreams

I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drinkin' problem and a jealous ol' man in jail
I want one so ugly she'll crack a mirror and so fat she'll knock a train off a rail
Hell, I don't care if she cheats on me as long as she sends me checks in the mail
I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drinkin' problem and a jealous ol' man in jail

I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drinkin' problem and a jealous ol' man in jail