Solace

Give me solace
Give me solace
Been through this many times before
Don't know if I can take it anymore
Give me solace
Give me solace
So sick of putting up this fight
I might just end it all tonight
All I need is music and marijuana
They loud enough to drown the noise and help me bare the drama
I twist the paper shut, pucker up, and then I burn the tip
If this don't numb the pain then I'm outtie like the German whip
Just want the hurt to quit, I'm fightin' off the urge to get
The knife that's by the dresser, and start applyin' pressure
Tell me how that sound though, suppress the sorrow down low
'Cuz life's an elevator and I'm headed for the ground flo'
And lately I've been feelin' like my loved ones ain't been fuckin' with me
Gettin' defensive when I ask 'em to discuss it with me
I’m probably just trippin', but I’m still tryna make it right
'Cuz I done reached my breakin' point and soon I might be takin' flight
My depression steady gettin' the best of me
'Cuz sadness and sobriety is such a painful recipe
Ain't sure what's on the other side, but I ain't really scared
Please don't cry for me when I'm gone if you never really cared
Give me solace
Give me solace
Been through this many times before
Don't know if I can take it anymore
Give me solace
Give me solace
So sick of putting up this fight
I might just end it all tonight
Another sleepless night, no dreams to envision
The THC in my system's all that's relievin' the tension
Wearin' an apathetic mask to hide my sense of self doubt
Family suggestin' that some therapy could probably help out
But I ain't tryna have no shrink tell me I’m borderin' manic
Just so he can write me a script for a quarter of Xanax
I’m on the floor in a panic, it's just too horrid to manage
I play it cool, but on the inside is disorder and damage
Tell me what the hell did I do to deserve this shit?
I try my hardest but still don't know what my purpose is
I always fall back in a slump with too much hurt to fix
Keep my emotions bottled up 'cuz it ain't worth the risk
To open up to anybody, they probably wouldn't understand
What this pain is like, I wouldn't wish it on another man
At times I sit and pray to God, but is he really there?
Why would he let me suffer like this if he ever really cared?
Fuck
Give me solace
Give me solace
Been through this many times before
Don't know if I can take it anymore
Give me solace
Give me solace
So sick of putting up this fight
I might just end it all tonight