XXX MM

I've been solo for so long
I just ricochet off the walls
I've been the lone wolf for so long
I'm just tryna understand it all
I've been solo for so long
I'm just tryna understand it all

I been solo so I'm so low
And nobody figured out or knows though
But I've been thinking bout the end and how it goes though
Will I even ever have a sold out show bro
Cause nowadays I been in a damn mindset
Where I been looking for something I cannot find yet
I'm worried if I don't make it by the time that
X did then my story just rewind X
I been damn scared
That he go bam there
And I die so young and no one ever damn cares
See I just want to build a legacy and step by step
I get more listeners but somehow I let
All the darker thoughts that somehow my mind kept
So I gotta be known fore in the light I'm checked
That's why I'm payin tribute that's why I like X
Cause he left a legacy he made em cry effects
Like that I'm tryna achieve, and I been tryna believe
For inspiration I'm looking and X's mystery
To me he's the sublime I hope I glisten G
And I been looking for something now that he's missing G

I've been solo for so long
I just ricochet off the walls
I've been the lone wolf for so long
I'm just tryna understand it all
I've been solo for so long
I'm just tryna understand it all

Y'all tell me that the objects in the mirror are hellish
But I've been tryna heal and say self care ain't selfish
But all of y'all still judge you don't need it you're perfecto
But y'all gave me hurt feelings and I dunno what's next though
Imma build up my ladders to get out of the deep end
Until then imma keep on waiting for every damn weekend
Sometimes I feel l'm not real and I don't know who I am
One last thing before y'all speak let me show you the program
So you know I've been all in my damn mind
Overthinking everything I'm tryna find
A way out to the innocence of damn 09
Cause back then I was happy I just want to rewind
But I just gotta realize
No matter how hard I try
Imma never erase the demons that hide so deep inside
Cause they always in there schemin tryna give me bad vibes
I just wanna know their meanin but hey I'm still alive
Barely so I'm in a place where I don't know what to do
Man I can't even write this song without questioning who you
Are writing this for Johnny Mac X or yourself to seem cool
Just to have a way so you can show that you're depressed through
Hey I've been tryna get up but I just keep falling down
So I listen to Mac all for that positive sound
Then he died so damn young so I took a look around
Found new problems and I never learned to swim so I drowned

But I'm tryna come back from the deep trench that I'm in
Cause by his words I know that's what Mac would've wanted
But I'm in a dark place and I'm not optimistic
And I know that he did it but I can't get through tough hits, and

Its funny how people can change their old ways
Wanna keep doing it but its labeled as a phase
Cause based off their first impression they all see him as the same
And most people that affected think that they can never change
And I been going through that
But Mac didn't do that
He evolved as a person and then everybody knew that
He was just like us he just kept it so real and true that
I related being someone with feelings and cool rap
So I no longer feel alone
Just to think that someone else
So respected and so grown
Could feel something like myself
Its like its a sign of hope
To think he was just like me
He done came up from his slopes
And ended with a legacy
So I'm paying tribute giving him what he deserves
Cause I connected to him through his truth and facts
Mac Imma tell you something: that from you I learned
That I keep swimming never drowning never going back

And I knew I'd come back from the deep trench that I'm in
Cause by his words I know that's what Mac would've wanted
He was in that dark place but he was optimistic
So I know if he did it I can get through tough hits