in these walls

Closet full of bones
But I still hang my clothes anyway
Insecure, cause I don't know who I'm supposed to be
In this world, where pain must be a scar you can see
Otherwise no one will hear your screams
Bridges burning, I'm off a thirty
I don't know who I am
Seven-thirty, my head is hurting
From all the medicines
That I thought would give me the answers
But all I get is new questions, ya
I can't fall asleep but I don't wanna stay up
Can't take this call but I don't wanna hang up
Lately I've been such a stranger to myself
Intrusive thoughts leaving scars on my heart
Still chasing me 'til I'm six feet down
I been fighting system failures
In these walls
Sedatives filling my veins cause I can't sleep
Always up late cause I can't take the bad dreams
Got a demon on my chest but I can't scream
Cause no one can hear me
Stimulants up in my brain like a bandaid
For the fresh wounds that don't leave a blood stain
I still paint a smile on the mask like I'm two face, ya
I can't fall asleep but I don't wanna stay up
Can't take this call but I don't wanna hang up
Lately I've been such a stranger to myself
Intrusive thoughts leaving scars on my heart
Still chasing me 'til I'm six feet down
I've been fighting system failures
In these walls
I got prescription poison
In my heart and in my soul
So loud up here, can't hear nothing
Sorry I missed your call
Everyday I'm fighting ghosts that all just wanna tear me down
It took me months to see that someone cares inside this lonely world
And I'll put all my blood and sweat and tears so I don't let her go
Cause I just wanna see my future daughter get her cap and gown
I wear blunt smoke like cologne
I spend late nights drinking alone
Cause I don't know how else to cope
With all these thoughts that aren't my own
I wake up to anxiety that's killing my sobriety
I know that I'm a mess but my worst enemy's inside of me
I can't fall asleep but I don't wanna stay up
Can't take this call but I don't wanna hang up
Lately I've been such a stranger, in these walls
Words like razor blades, ice on my tongue
Blood stains on the page as I write this song
It's hard to feel cause I'm too fucked up
Can't hear myself in these walls
That's the one