Plastic Smile

Nathanael Elmshaeuser

I see you walking past me
Headphones on
You got these people always asking
How you doing
You lie to them and answer falsely
I'm doing fine
You've got a smile but it's plastic
It's plastic
No matter what you say I know you've been crying yourself your sleep
You try to pray but it seems like there's nobody listening
Gotta say don't get scared of much but I can't help but think
That one these days you gon look at life and choose to leave
You try to stand but you're falling to your knees
Got some friends but nobody knows your needs
Comprehend when you're praying earnestly
But can't depend on only silence answering
I compete with every voice inside my head
Telling me I can't compete with all the rest
They should exist to bring me peace but they instead
Screaming at me that I'm better off dead
Better left out where you can't hurt
Keep your real self kicked to the dirt
Don't derve hope it ain't for sure
That youll be here for tomorrow
You can barely breathe
Bout time that you take a breeze
You feel like you never break free
Could somebody get me peace
I see you walking past me
Headphones on
You got these people always asking
How you doing
You lie to them and answer falsely
I'm doing fine
You've got a smile but it's plastic
It's plastic
Look
Validation isn't from within
But I still there again and again
Upwards the only way to look
Unless it's down at the Holy Book
I get distracted tell myself to man up
That's well and good but I can barely stand up
Marching long to the beat of a drum
But it ain't mine I hope they ain't wrong
Been wearing me down walking past everybody the crowd
Surrounding cacophony silence is loud
I cover my ears though they don't make a sound
It's been unbearable all of this wait
Drawing my sword I've been challenging fate
It hits me again and again in the face
This more like a beatdown less of a race
I rage against the pain within
I can't remain the way I've been
This place replays the shame and sin
Feels like a blade upon my skin
I am walking past you
Headphones on
I've got these people always asking
How I'm doing
I lie to them and answer falsely
I'm doing fine
I've got a smile but it's plastic
It's plastic

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