Calvin and Hobbes

I’m like five years old moving around to six
Every Sunday morning Calvin and Hobbes comic strip
Tiger came alive, day before, I’m riding high
Watching X-Men at eleven it’s on channel five
Couple hours later in church singing songs to God
Me and my cousin Hal in the back recite a lot of rhymes
Had a Walkman by Sony, bootlegging shit
Three dollars to the Africans on one twenty-fifth
Clue tapes best to big out that was the manuscript
The Lox Family, DMX vs. Cannabis
Recording over gospel tapes, I was a fan of it
Inside stuff from ? to Analysts
Black Power Ranger was black, so amazing
Yellow Power Ranger was hot, she was an Asian
Wait a minute, black and yellow, Wiz Khalifa shit?
Yellow, Asian, damn I can’t believe this shit
Used to steal my pop’s CDs and put ‘em back later
Found out about Biggie by 'em, baby baby!
Michael Jordan dunking on Ewing, then there was Pippen next
Hardaway, Mourning, man we never get respect
‘Til Starks dunked on the Bulls, baseline crack
Bulls fans cried it was Horace, Jordan was in the back
Me? I was a Sonic fan I loved Shawn Kemp
Gary Payton throwing alley-oops to the strong pimp
Seven kids, six mothers, drug user, alcoholic
Before school I watched Zack kiss every freak
On Saved By The Bell, Lisa Turtle duckin’ Screech
Lark Voorhies was on fire, Never really liked Laura
Had a crush on Mira, would’ve banged out Topanga
Prolly got messy, dreamt of head from Kelly, would’ve gave pills to Jessie
Me and my cousin Vinny snuck and heard all The Chronic
Throwing fake guns in the air acting like Onyx
Found my pop’s porn on the shelf in his closet
Used to watch Janet Jacme scream loud getting popped in
Still a virgin, paper boy in baggy jeans
I had Parasucos with lines down the seams
Can’t we get along? We singing simple songs
Timothy McVeigh vs. Flex, who got the bigger bombs?
Cell phones big as a forearm, ditched prom
Didn’t have a date, my ex blamed it on Islam
Street Fighter that was the shit, I used Ryu
Played Genesis all day, Streets of Rage 2
Martha Stewart was a good thing
Stealing potato chips from the stores was a hood thing
The Knicks in the middle of the Finals
Olajuwon spinning off Ewing for the title
We had a Gulf War, what the fuck for?
Kids in Somalia died ‘cause they starved
Dawg, my president ain’t black
But my man got head and he sure can play the sax
Then he got an office in Harlem next to blacks
Smoked weed but he didn’t inhale, how real is that?
White boys in trench coats aired out Columbine
Tossing old kicks in the air on top of power lines
Worked a McDonald’s job for a dollar sign
And got fired for McFlurrys I was tryna slide
Forrest Gump on the bench sitting awkwardly
Ready to Die was my artery
I remember writing lyrics down from Bone Thugs N Harmony
Recite it back to my friends so they’d be a part of me
Loved Diddy before the shiny shit
I’m a 80s baby and a 90s kid, dig?