Meh

I interrupt this program to tell y'all
That I'm trying my best
And sometimes I feel like my best isn't good enough
It never is
But I'm trying
I am
And I'll work through that
For us and for me
Yeah this is my mind and entire heart
I just had to push this shit to push this shit to push to start
And every time you called me lazy swear that I was going hard
And I would cut off my entire leg to prove you fuckers wrong
My friends say I don't go out I was focused in on focusing
I told them I made progress hope you noticed it I'm closing in
I want to be the one that make it out and let them know shit
That place that where I'm from they ain't been hoping it I'm going in
Yeah
Yeah they hoping I get caught up in a loop
If I'm being honest here's the fucking truth
I'm just so scared to fucking lose
My whole life I feel like gotta prove
Not to you but to my fucking self
Every time I talk about my future I get overwhelmed
People around me care for me and I would still not ask for help
I would rather put my mind through struggle put my shit through hell
Yeah I know it's not okay okay okay
Yeah I know it's not okay okay okay
Keep saying I'ma fix this shit okay okay
But not today today
Today today
Day to day and day to day
I feel like I would fadeaway
And fadeaway
I feel like I die fatally
I hope that I erase away
I hope that I just made your day
And made a way
Cause honestly my goal in this shit is just go and pave a way
I'm just hoping that you understand it
Cause my whole life I've been abandoned
Yeah might have to turn into a bandit
Yeah my mind is beat up shit is damaged
Yeah you know I'm northside shit preoccupied
And opposites
I'm positive
That my mind wants the opposite
But my heart been a stopping it
I swear that this ain't cocky shit
They say that this shit crock of shit
A crock of shit
I swear that I am popping it
Woah
Yeah my highs and my lows
I try to go and stop
I'm on go
Yeah all these problems weighing on my brain
Yeah I don't even know what to think
Yeah I'm feeling like I'm going insane
Ain't stop me before ain't gonna stop me now
I'm the only person that can hold me down
Come and see me at a show I be showing out
I was going light speed but now I'm slowing down
Yeah I start to trust the process and I wonder how
How I got to feel this feeling that I'm feeling now
I'm about to go a hundred to a hundred thou