Suicidal Thoughts

Suicidal thoughts got me ready to kill flows
Kill slow and live fast just make some real dough
I'm real tho
And being real I'm to real at it
like crack attics that quit and go back
It's a still habit
Uh
Lifestyles of the poor, black, and the shameless
Tryna make it in the world to be rich black and famous
To then give rich back to the young black and nameless
I'm tryna reach the heights that no one black man ain't claim yet
I Ain't make it to the moon
Cause I'm still tryna reach the stars from the Ceiling in my room
And I know I got some scars from these feelings I consume
But it's better I conceal them than to give me all to you
But that's another story
Where time depended on it like wether the weather was stormy
Or just pure sunshine
Like times I wish my mom was alive to see her son shine
And even in my darkest days I try to find light
They say you don’t know what you got till its gone out your sight
Maybe I’m misguided
But I miss gliding through the world where i was missed minded
Memories of growing up fast, my childhood gets blinded
This time its, ten times as hard for yah
And yea you got a good girl, but them hoes make it hard for yah
And you ain't tryna slip up
But the way you feeling right now, man you just tryna fuck
Man the way you feeling right now, you don't give a fuck
But, but
Gotta keep going
Gotta keep going, hold up
Man you gotta keep going
Gotta keep going, hold up
Gotta keep going
Gotta keep going
Gotta keep going
Suicidal thoughts got me ready to let go
Like on your mark, get set, go
Who ready for death row?
Got me feeling like a grenade that ain't yet blow
Dead
But up in my head I'm ready like let's go
Dreams from the city, they all looking like nightmares
When will I become the guy I dreamed about that's right there
On them stages
Making changes, meeting different faces
But is faced with slight fears of not making it
Cause my plan A ain't seem to B what it need to be
Instead I took advice from people on what my life need to be
Now I'm thinking of what my life means to me
Like should I continue with these thoughts that occupy my mind so frequently?
Or end it all, offend them all
It's hard for dreams to come true when they wanna take them
And you tryna defend them all
And you say it's hard to have your life right
Well I'm wondering what that life's like
Caught up in a lifestyle that I'm living tryna live another
In a world where don't grow together but outlive each other
Man this shit just a bad scene
Dreaming from the city tryna wake up from this bad dream
But, but
I gotta keep going
Gotta keep going, hold up
Man I gotta keep going