Martin Got a Haircut

Martin used to look so cool
With his hair down to his shoulders
Martin used to look so cool
With his hair down to his waist
Now he just looks like a fool
Never knew how big his ears were
He forgot the golden rule
Don't trust someone else's taste

Oh no
I hate to be the one to say
``I hate to say `I told you so' ''

Martin used to look so hip
With his hair spread all around him
Martin used to look so hip
Never needed mousse or gel
Now he just looks like a dip
Don't he know it's not the fifties
Should have never took that trip
To the barbershop from hell

Oh no
I hate to be the one to say
``I hate to say `I told you so' ''

Since Martin got a haircut
Since Martin got a haircut
Since Martin got a haircut
We don't like him no more

Martin's hair had such allure
He could wrap it round his elbows
Martin's hair had such allure
He could tuck it in his pants
Now it just looks rather poor
I don't care if it's in fashion
Should have bagged the new coiffure
Took off while he had the chance

Oh no
I hate to be the one to say
``I hate to say `I told you so' ''

Maybe it'll grow out
Maybe in a couple years
Maybe it'll grow out
Seven hundred thirty days filled with tears

Martin, why'd you get the buzz
Now you look like you're in ROTC
Martin, why'd you get the buzz
You look like someone you are not
Now your head's covered with fuzz
Like some skinhead neo-Nazi
Should have left your hair as was
I don't care if it was hot

Oh no
I hate to be the one to say
``The do you got has got to go''

Since Martin got a haircut
Since Martin got a haircut
Since Martin got a haircut
We don't like him no more