The Telescope Reading (Of Course)

He lived alone
With his books and his records and his telescope
With all the doors locked
Days piled upon each other one by tedious one, until the pressure finally created a diamond like thought
And he was instantly sad
I've read every book
I've heard every song
And I've seen every star from the safety of my bedroom
And I am empty
In defeat, he slumped forward with his eyes still pressed against the telescope
Just then, his lungs began to expand
He blinked rapidly, alternating his eyes between squinting and making his eyes as wide as saucers
He cried out, "Of course!"
With all the hours spent looking up
It never crossed his mind to veer straight ahead
He spent days upon days taking it all in
He saw children grow to become men
And men grow to become fools
He saw hope, beauty, war, strength, weakness, chaos, stillness
He watched until he could recite each scene from memory
Eventually, he wrote his own books about what he saw
And he made his own songs about what he thought he had heard
Until almost he himself believed what he was creating to be true
Until lie upon lie piled on top of itself
Until the pressure finally created a pearl-like thought
He spoke to the world
"I've seen all of your lives
And I've heard all of your conversations
And I am hungry."

In frustration, he dropped to his knees and began to bang his head against the old wooden door
"Of course," he cried out
And without hesitation, he stood up, put on his coat and hat, and turned the knob
But before his first step even hit the ground
He was faced with the most unexpected of emotions
One that he could only figure to be what his favorite books and records refer to as love
"Where are you going?" she asked him
"I don't know."
"Me too" she smiled, "I'll take you there."
She extended her tiny hand and swept him away with her

They walked until their feet bled
During their journey, she told him all the places she had been
And all the people she had met along the way
A new emotion began to unfold inside of him
One he thought he had overheard in a conversation looking through his telescope
It was the word fear
"Why would she choose me?" he thought, "I know so little."
Not wanting to lose her interest
He began telling her stories he thought she might be impressed by
But all they did was make her question his strength and ability to battle the enemies that she knew would surely jump out at them one day
But she still kept her faith in him and they continued walking

What amazing things they saw
They danced in dark caves
Warmed their faces by the brightest of fires
And played with brilliant children in the blue Spanish sea
But even amidst all that gorgeousness
Their hands began to slip
First from palms, then to fingertips, then to nothingness
They stood still
She faced south, and he faced west
He called out to her
"I'm leaving now, and I blame you for the state we're in

"And through all of our adventures, I've done nothing wrong
And though you've taught me how to breathe
I'm taking my new voice and leaving you here with nothing."

She looked back and cried out to him
"We drew a map together that you promised you would follow with me
I, too, am scared
Especially after you stole my strength and made it your own
But I am still reaching for your hand
Knowing it will fit more perfectly than ever
If you will only reach back to me."
But he didn't reach back
He was vain and confused
He tried to make a new map, but he didn't know where to put the "X" anymore
So he walked in circles
He lost his rhythm
He froze by the fire
And he drowned in the sea
He made himself what he had feared the most
Incomplete
And even though the decision was his and his alone, he blamed her for that, too

But the whole time she followed him
Looking for fallen twigs and fresh footprints to see where he was going
But all he left in his path were messages written in the dirt with a broken stick
Scrawled lies of anger and shifted blame
Until one day he wrote the word "help" when he needed her most
But by then, she had stopped trying to read his thoughts
And making sense of his misery
So he headed back to where he started
Back to his books and his records and his telescope

Battered and broken
He finally reached the edge of his street
Only to find her waiting for him
And upon seeing her soft smile
He immediately knew what he had done
He knew what he had lost
He knew how sorry he was
For the first time, she was real to him
They sat and spoke about everything they should have in the beginning of their story
And through all the tears, he learned that she had been walking her entire life
And that she wasn't waiting for him to go into the world with her at all
No, she was in fact waiting for him to invite her into his house
So she could read his books, hear his records and look through the telescope behind the safety of his locked door

"What a fool," he thought
"I didn't realize that with all this time I spent looking out this window, you were right there looking back at it
At me, at this, at us
I already had what you had been traveling these roads searching for."
She crumbled under the weight of hearing her own truth
And through their honesty
They were both as strong as they can be
And now, under the relief of each note of forgiveness, no thought appeared to them
Just a feeling
And he whispered to her
"I've seen your efforts
And I can feel your love for me
And I am whole
I still have places to visit and mistakes to make in private
But take my home and make it your own
Recite lines from my favorite books in the garden
Hear the songs closest to my life while you sleep in my bed
And look through me waving at you through my telescope
He raised his hand and he rested it on her chest
And he drew an "X" across her heart
"Of course," he thought
He slowly closed the old wooden door
And he locked it behind him