Risk/Reward

I'm cold, conscience numbing from the windchill
Unfold, words start flowing
There's a lot to say

Now should I step away?
How could I anyway?
I've traced it back right to the days
I hate the guilt but love the taste

My eyes should be gouged
This can't resolve
Those eyes were too much
For the walls my soul created
In the frigid arms of winter
We burned the wick at both ends
Then tricked ourselves but didn't know

Feels good, knowing no one isn't out there
The reach casts across the sea
When the feeling passes, another casualty
I've traced it right back to the day
I hate the game but love to play

Those eyes are gouging
This can't be good
My eyes saw too much for the mind my skull protected
In the frigid arms of winter
We burned the wick at both ends
I felt the heat but couldn't let go