The Phallic Menace
[Intro: Trials & Masta Ace (sampled)]
Ooh, yeah, take a look at this one
Yeah, that's mine, yeah, that's mine, I got that one
Yeah, no no! Don't be scared!
Where you going? "Scared of the dick"
Hey, come back! Come here! "Scared of the dick"
Fucking always scared of the dick "Scared of the dick"
"Scared of the dick as if the shit's haunted"
[Verse 1: Trials]
What's up girl? I know you're scared of the dick
I thank Allah each day that I was paired with a dick
Checked into the doctors like "This don't look right"
Overgrown pubes, my dood look like Suge Knight
Doctor, doctor, what the fuck's happening?
They came back with bigger butts than Kim Kardashian
But it can't be
So big when you piss you gotta shake more than Ali
Mirror, mirror, is there a dick bigger?
There was none, put a ring through it, call it Pierce Brosnan
Passed out when the blood rushed to it
Skeez suck the piece like they trying to get the nuts through it
The P's enormous, somewhat gorgeous
Blacksmith dick, a sword if it was balless
It's got a mind of its own
It would've forget me if I wasn't attached to it, I knew it
[Hook: Trials]
You're scared of the dick, no shit, me too
It's big (it's big) it's large (what you going to do?)
[Verse 2: Sesta]
Just leave it alone
No pressure if you need it to grow
It's the blue chip dick, mean it stay big
Too much drink mean it awesome
Bring form in, fill 'em out, fill 'em up, fill 'em in
Let 'em know that they f-ing with a Steven King ding-a-ling
CSI get the trace
But they drop the case 'cause they scared of the dick
(As if the shit's haunted) Even the lord don't want none
Creeping in the dark, swear he playing with a shotgun
But believe nothings sawn-off
As a kid, I could've swing it at minister to warn him off
Keep it away, keep evil at bay with it
Fucking up my Feng Shui to keeping off the rain with it
You ain't gotta lie
'Cause I can see it in your face, quit complaining and say it
[Hook: Trials]
You're scared of the dick, no shit, me too
It's big (it's big) it's large (what you going to do?)
[Verse 3: Hons]
Ain't no need to be scared of it
Only looks that big 'cause I shaved all the hair off it
Hard to pull like the sword in the stone
But god damn I'm proud, I can call this my own
When I posh wank with silk in a man-sized tissue
It get angry and erupt like an active Mt Vesuvius
[?] careful when you take me
The circumcise circumference like a small tin of baked beans
Blast off with a red rocket
Start to count down from ten when you go to bob your head on it
After ten beers, this bastard gets lazy
This ain't how I brought him up, this ain't how I raised him
The piece leaves you a bit shook
Fascinated by the hairy anomaly like Bigfoot
Look, relax, chill
Just wait 'til I get the camera out, he gains ten pounds on film
[Hook: Trials]
You're scared of the dick, no shit, me too
It's big (it's big) it's large (what you going to do?)
[Outro: Trials]
Oh, what the fuck was that?
I don't know man, it looked like a massive dick
Fucking hell! Scared the shit out of me!