One Big Pickle

[Verse 1]
I'm free, motherfuckers
No prison can hold me motherfuckers
Now I can be who I want to be
But first, I really have to pee
The cops will never stop hunting
But maybe that’s a fun thing
Stress keeps a vagina moist, and that concludes my point
Thank you for coming to my ted talk
I think I'm going to die at 12 o' clock
I can hear the sirens start to approach
Maybe I’ll pretend to be a roach

[Pre-Chorus 1]
I'm caught in a pickle
And I don't mean Michael's Dick

[Chorus]
I can't go back to jail
Everyone in there looks like a whale
I'm too skinny to be illegal
You better stay back, 'cause this pussy is lethal

[Verse 2]
While I was locked up, I met two beautiful women named Grendel and Muriel
They taught me how to make love on a concrete floor
And in return I taught them how to be a whore
And in the night, I had a fright t
That I'd be alone forever, massaging my old woman pussy
I couldn’t ask for anything better

[Pre-Chorus 2]
Oh shit here they come
I’m in a real pickle
And I don't mean Michael’s Dickle

[Chorus]
I can't go back to jail
Everyone in there looks like a whale
I'm too skinny to be illegal
You better stay back, 'cause this pussy is lethal
Leave me alone or I’ll do something crazy
Like [Unintelligible] a defenseless baby
Let's play a game, you should all be fucking ashamed
I'm not a threat to children's safety

[Bridge]
Deborah, you're fucking under arrest again
No
What do you mean "No"?
Stay back or I'll fucking blow the local orphanage to smithereens
Nice try, Deborah, we don't even have a local orphana-
[innocent children screaming in pain and dying]
What the fuck just happened?
I just blew the local orphanage to smithereens

[Chorus]
I can't go back to jail
Everyone in there looks like a whale
I'm too skinny to be illegal
You better stay back, 'cause this pussy is lethal
Leave me alone or I'll do something crazy
Like [Unintelligible] a defenseless baby
Let's play a game, you should all be fucking ashamed
I'm not a threat to children's safety