XXXMas

Once upon a time
There was a girl who lived in the suburbs
Croydon to be precise
She had one wish and, one wish only
She laid in her bed and
Made that wish one night
In hopes that Santa's elves and
Santa's little helpers would
Pass on the message of how she feels inside
She looked up to the sky and
Oh shit, Santa replied

Roll up the mistletoe, sip on some wine
Lets make it snow, it's Christmas time
No playing herе, make it rain dear
(Ho, ho, ho) it's Christmas!
Only Santa in my chimney
Hе want all this smoke
It's cold outside, wear me as a coat
Saint Nicholas, let's get ridiculous
Come leave me knickerless

X-Rated Christmas, XXXMas
Lets get it cracking
All the trimmings and the extras
Do it pon di tree, do it pon di TV
Do it pon mi likkle
Nephew's brand new Sketchers
We don't really for nutting
Only business is nutting
One foot pon di stocking
Do it pon di tree, do it pon di TV
Do it pon dat big present for my cousin

Baddest rap bitch, unwrap this
My presence is a present
Underneath that is a gift
Rolling up the essence, smoking on the Grinch
Light up the myrrh and frankincense
It's the naughty nativity, you know it's me
Got the plum pudding and you know it's sweet
Obviously take a bite on this fruitcake
Firewood touché
Do it to me baby 'til the bell break

And just like that, her wish was granted
The girl from South took Santa's North Pole
And encompassed her inner ho, ho, ho

Come to the door
I'm wearing nutting but stockings
Jockey, how I'm riding, you
Can't cat this cat, copy
Like a pizza how I'm giving the toppings
Sloppy all over the Williams, Robbie
Advent calendar, you open me up
More curvy than a turkey
And it's perky as fuck
Pudding from Croydon, not from Yorkshire
Oliver Twist, they want more sir

X-Rated Christmas, XXXMas
Lets get it cracking
All the trimmings and the extras
Do it pon di tree, do it pon di TV
Do it pon mi likkle
Nephew's brand new Sketchers
We don't really for nutting
Only business is nutting
One foot pon di stocking
Do it pon di tree, do it pon di TV
Do it pon dat big present for my cousin

Do it pon di tree, do it pon di Xbox
Baileys on the rocks
Slay everyday in case you forgot
It's Christmas only Santa in my chimney
He want all this smoke
It's cold outside, wear me as a coat
Saint Nicholas, let's get ridiculous
Come leave me knickerless

Yo, you know I'm ready for anything
Call me go go go
You're locked in and listening
To The Coco Show
Take a ride in the sleigh and
I'll have you looking for more
I'll be emptying the sack screaming ho, ho
Ho very modest but I've gotta be honest
I'm not a student of college
So if you've got it, you've got it
Vitamin D and I'm eating all of the porridge
Jingle Belling all the way into the room
Show me sutting like christmas, Christmas
What we got on the gift list?
Been eating good not just sipping
On tea and biscuit's
Wagwan cousin? We're cooking like the
Stuffing in the oven
Presents aren't getting cheaper by the dozen
Na this one's a slapper
Me, I'm just tryna see what's
Inside of my cracker true
It's half eight and this
Vossi's got me battered
If you never got nothing from me
This year, it never mattered, na

X-Rated Christmas, XXXMas
Lets get it cracking baby
X-Rated Christmas, XXXMas
Lets get it cracking baby