Is This Real

In hope of tangibility I create
Trying find what was lost and never made
The pain the love
The factions formed
My place in it all
The fate I was given but not yet grasped
Changes lies everything in between
Hopes that burn out and grow anew
Reds change to blue then back to green
My hate and love in everything
Am I finished yet
Or is this Cognitive Dissonance
Five hundred blunts and that's just last week
Got a scar on my back where they last stabbed me
No more pills
I can be your friend if you ask me
If are chances last how you feel
Tell me are you real
Is this real
If I'm doing bad tell me how you feel
Tell me are you real
Is this real
If I'm in my bag tell me what's the deal
Tell me are you real
Loosing touch with reality
Falling In between comfortable and tragedies
If I open up my heart what else would you ask of me
If I give you everything I got then that's bad for me
Phone on dnd
I can't help but hide myself
Cause I don't want to feel anything
So alone I remind myself
Swear I'm so lost let me be
My only hope to find myself
Made a way through these cds
But ain't nobody try to help
I'm so fucked in the worst way
Everything I love tries to hurt me
Use me desert me
I was drugging for the longest
Had hustle out my problems
Avoiding all the drama
False karma
Five hundred blunts and that's just last week
Got a scar on my back where they last stabbed me
No more pills
I can be your friend if you ask me
If are chances last how you feel
Tell me are you real
Is this real
If I'm doing bad tell me how you feel
Tell me are you real
Is this real
If I'm in my bag tell me what's the deal
Tell me are you real