The Room Where It Happens

[CANDACE, spoken]
Ooh! Ooh! Mom!

[LINDA, spoken]
Candace, be calm

[CANDACE, spoken]
Did you see the thing the boys built that gave me a huge qualm?

[LINDA, spoken]
No

[CANDACE, spoken]
Ya know the old tire swing?

[LINDA, spoken]
Yeah

[CANDACE, spoken]
They made it a hover car, now it's got a working intercom

[LINDA, spoken]
Sure

[CANDACE, spoken]
All you have to do is look!

[LINDA, spoken]
Now those are words I’ve heard

[CANDACE, spoken]
They're in the yard by the brook!

[PHINEAS, spoken]
Hi Mom!

[LINDA, spoken]
Now how were they flying on that small old tire?

[CANDACE, spoken]
No, it was just there! Mom, I swear I'm not a liar!

[LINDA]
Stress less, smile more

[CANDACE]
Uh-huh

[LINDA]
Do whatever it takes to end this eternal fraternal war

[CANDACE, spoken]
But Phinеas and Ferb are relеntless!

[LINDA]
Having fun doesn’t make them sinners

[CANDACE, spoken]
No, but they-

[LINDA, spoken]
I'm sorry, Candace, I gotta go

[CANDACE, spoken]
But Mom!

[LINDA, spoken]
I've gotta get started on dinner

[CANDACE]
A triangle and a rectangle sit in the backyard

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
Brothers way younger than men, ten

[CANDACE]
They emerge with some blueprints for inventions that haven't been

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
Thought of since the pen, then

[CANDACE]
The adolescents build one with unprecedented constructive efficiency
An escalator that can take you to the moon
Or a rollercoaster spanning the town built in a morning
But then it's gone that afternoon

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
No one's ever in the room where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
No one's ever in
The room where it happens (The room where it happens)
The room where it happens
The room where it happens (The room where it happens)
No one really knows how the gadgets here (Gadgets here)
Which are quite severe all just disappear (All just disappear)
And Mom assumes it never happened (Assumes it never happened)
Because she's never in the room where it happens. (The room where it happens)

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
Brothers claim

[PHINEAS]
We build new things every day. I don’t know where they go, but they get out of our way!

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
Baljeet claims

[BALJEET]
It is peculiar they go missing. Have you tried forming a hypothesis using retrodiction?

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
Buford claims

[BUFORD]
“Where’d that hovercraft go?” I'd tell you if you bribed me, but I really don’t know

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
Girl Scouts claim

[ISABELLA]
I don't know why it went fleeting. I just made the engine

[GINGER]
The paint job

[GRETCHEN]
The seating!

[CANDACE]
So no one's ever in

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens

[CANDACE]
No one ever sees the

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
Room where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
No one really knows where the doohickeys go (The doohickeys go)
The reason why they're never still around tomorrow (Still around tomorrow)
And Mom assumes it never happened (Assumes it never happened)
Because she’s never in the room where it happens. (The room where it happens)

[COMPANY]
Meanwhile

[COLTRANE]
‘Nessa is grapplin' with the fact that her father spends his waking hours trying to be evil

[COMPANY]
Meanwhile

[COLTRANE]
OWCA is celebrating back at their capital

*animal sounds*

[COLTRANE]
It's an upheaval

[KATIE]
Then Jeremy texts Candace ‘bout their impending date night
And Candace responds with her fifteen-year-old insight

[CANDACE]
Maybe we could solve one problem with the other
And you can help me bust my little brothers, in other words

[JEREMY]
Oh no, a bro sideshow

[CANDACE]
Can you go?

[JEREMY]
Can't we just enjoy the dance and go with the flow?

[CANDACE]
Well I'd love to, but-

[JEREMY]
This is a chance you can't blow?

[CANDACE]
Me so well, you know
We'll be a snoopy duo

[JEREMY]
Let's go!

CANDACE
Oh--!

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
We're gonna find
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens
We're on our way to find the room where it happens
The room where it happens
The room where it happens

[JEREMY]
My god, this girl is nuts!
And she's never gonna stop until she gets the bust
But her fervor's got me rappin'
I guess I'll help her find the room where it happens

[COMPANY]
Danville City Maintenance

[CANDACE]
What happened to my brothers' plane that conveniently flowed on down the river?

[COMPANY]
Hightail Delivery Co

[CANDACE]
Where'd my brothers get the funds to finance the express excess of girders you deliver?

[COMPANY]
Ferb and Phineas Flynn

[CANDACE]
Did you know it doesn't even matter how big and noticeable your inventions are?

[PHINEAS]
It's not about the scale, it's about having fun

[CANDACE]
You built a haunted mansion

[PHINEAS]
And fun is what we won!
When we have an idea, we see it through to the end
And if we build what we envision, we don't have to pretend
We've got one summer, and we won't ignore it
School's coming, we won't-

[PHINEAS & COMPANY]
Wait for it, Wait for it

[CANDACE ]
Wait!
No, it's too much mayhem!
There's gotta be some reason that nothing outlives them

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
It's gotta be somewhere (It's gotta be somewhere)
It's gotta be someone! (It's gotta be someone)
It can't just be magic (It's gotta be somewhere)
So who is this someone?! (It's gotta be some-)

[DOOFENSHMIRTZ]
I…
I want to be in the room where it happens
The room where it happens
I...
I want to be in the room where it happens
The room where it happens

[CANDACE & DOOFENSHMIRTZ, COMPANY]
I... (I wanna be in the room where it happens)
I wanna be in the room (The room where it happens)
The room where it happens (The room where it happens)
I... (I wanna be in the room where it happens)
I wanna be in the room… (The room where it happens)
(The room where it happens)
Oh, oh (I wanna be in the room where it happens)
(The room where it happens)

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
I wanna be in (The room where it happens)

[DOOFENSHMIRTZ & COMPANY]
I've got to be (I wanna be in)

[CANDACE & COMPANY]
I've got to be (The room where it happens)
In the room (The room where it happens)

[CANDACE & DOOFENSHMIRTZ, COMPANY]
In that big ol' room (The room where it happens)

[COMPANY]
The art of the brotherly bust

[CANDACE]
The boys'll get in trouble and I'll re-earn Mom's trust

[COMPANY]
How ‘bout a leader who can really serve

[DOOFENSHMIRTZ]
When I'm in charge, my bro will get what he deserves

[JEREMY/STACY/JENNY/VANESSA]
Is now the time to intervene?

[CANDACE & DOOFENSHMIRTZ]
I'm gonna overcome this age old routine

[CANDACE]
Old as that tomb I was trapped in

[CANDACE & DOOFENSHMIRTZ]
I've got to be in the room--

[COMPANY]
The room where it happens!

[CANDACE]
I've got to be!

[COMPANY]
The room where it happens!

[DOOFENSHMIRTZ]
I've got to be!

[COMPANY]
The room where it happens!

[CANDACE & DOOFENSHMIRTZ, COMPANY]
I've got to be in the room
(The room where it happens!)

[DOOFENSHMIRTZ]
I gotta be!

[CANDACE]
I gotta be

[CANDACE & DOOFENSHMIRTZ, COMPANY]
I wanna be in
(The room where it happens!)
In the room!
(I wanna be in the room where it happens!)

[CANDACE]
Click, boom!

[DOOFENSHMIRTZ, spoken]
Oh, THIS is my self-destruct button!